Oxford University will shortly be hosting a week-long
hate fest conference entitled “Israeli Apartheid Week”. Ever a beacon of free speech and open debate, Oxford is no doubt eager to host a parallel conference that is as unabashedly anti-Palestinian as this one will be anti-Israeli. As an alumna of Oxford myself, I want to do my part to foster a healthy exchange of views. I have therefore put together an agenda for a second conference, to take place concurrently with Israeli Apartheid Week.
In deference to the tradition established by Israeli Apartheid Week, this second conference will similarly feature incendiary and offensive language, cavalierly inaccurate use of terminology, and speakers who express only one side of the story.
The conference will cover all aspects of Palestinian society — culture, sociology, history, politics, and more. Here are the planned lectures and events:
“Palestine”: Terrorist Thugocracy Week
The Art of the Lie: Historical Inaccuracy as a Tool of National Self-Determination
“We Are a Blood-Drinking People”: A close look at the Palestinian fetishization of the murder of non-Muslims. The lecture will focus primarily on obsessive Palestinian hate for Jews and its manifestations, but will also address the persecution of Palestinian Christians by Palestinian Muslims. Appearances are scheduled by Israeli victims of Palestinian terror and by Palestinian Christians who have been intimidated, harrassed, threatened with death, and had their homes torched by their Muslim neighbors.
Learning to Spin: A photographic, video and documentary exhibition of Palestinian media manipulation. The centerpiece of the exhibition will be an examination of the IDF incursion into Jenin, the Palestinian massaging of the truth of the operation, and the credulity of the many international news organs that unhesitatingly disseminated their lies as facts. Special guest: one of the Palestinian “corpses” of Jenin that was taped climbing back onto its bier after a stumble will speak to the assembly. (He will be speaking via sattelite, as he is now a visiting fellow in The Philosophy of Media at Columbia.) Note: A separate lecture will be given on the al-Dura blood libel, possibly the Palestinians’ most successfully spun lie.
Screw the People; I Need a Villa: Evidence will be presented detailing the funneling of untold millions — possibly billions — of foreign aid dollars into the pockets of a small Palestinian minority. Special guest: Suha Arafat’s Paris couturier.
My Son the Mass Murderer: A roundtable discussion about institutionalized Palestinian child abuse. A close look at the curriculum of the Palestinian education system, the highest value of which is indoctrination to hate, violence, murder and suicide. There will be an accompanying slide presentation of Palestinian children, including toddlers and babies, dressed as gunmen and suicide bombers.
Free Speech Is For the Weak: An interview with the AP photographer who was going to file full imagery of the Palestinian celebrations at the fall of the Twin Towers until he was held at gunpoint and forced to clean up the story.
Kill the Women, Purge the Homosexuals: A lecture with question-and-answer session on the violent repression of women and homosexuals in Palestinian culture. The lecture will be given jointly by the mother of a Palestinian woman stabbed to death by her father and brothers for the crime of leaving an abusive husband, and the brother of a closeted Palestinian homosexual who was hunted down, captured, tortured, and publicly executed in Ramallah on trumped-up “collaboration” charges.
I have no doubt that the pro-Palestinian community at Oxford will welcome this second conference, as will the Oxford administration. Oxford is, after all, one of the finest academic institutions in the world, one that strives tirelessly to raise the level of discourse. The Jewish student body is expected to tolerate a week-long slander, and I’m sure the pro-Palestinian lobby at the University will graciously return the favor. Long may we all prosper in the ivory tower.